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At Crisis Care Ministries we have one goal:
We minister to the spiritual, emotional, and
practical needs of people
in crisis.
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The theology of grief is
not about enduring for the sake of
faith. It
is about Courage in the middle
of pain; Compassion in the middle of suffering; Healing
in the middle of brokenness; and, New Life in the middle of death.
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Crisis Care Ministries is currently ministering in major cities
across the United States. If we can offer any assistance to those who have been deeply affected
by tragedy please contact us today.
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1. At the Time of Loss:
- Accept the person's sense of loss - They may be in denial - "It can't be"
- Encourage the person to talk about the loss - the loved one - remembering special
moments, what this person meant to them.
- LISTEN - be there - where appropriate hold hand
- DO NOT rush to tell them that "everything will be fine" or give them false hope.
2. Working Through Pain:
- Accept person's need to "relive" event surrounding loss - They may need to repeat story many times.
- LISTEN - acknowledge their pain.
- Help by giving reassurance that pain will lessen - but this takes time - but remembering that pain will diminish but the experience of loss may continue for a long time.
- DO NOT - "push" person to move along by telling them it is time to "snap out of it" or its time "to move on with life"
- ENCOURAGE them to take small steps - one day at a time - encourage outside home activities little by little.
- If fearful or feeling guilty - DO NOT say the fear or guilt is foolish.
3. Misdirected Anger
Often ANGER is directed towards God or other caregivers (health care system,
doctor). Encourage the person to talk about these feelings:
- They may become tearful - allow the person to vent and cry.
- DO NOT defend God or others, or shame the person.
4. Working Through Grief
As person works through grief you can assist him/her by:
- Gentle encouragement to begin accepting social invitations.
- Accompany person on their first outing.
- Keeping in touch - often the first few days are intense with a lot of
people around - it is the following weeks, months that the person will need
you. Send a small card, bring flowers, offer to help with simple
things - shopping.
- It is not enough to say "call me if you need anything" instead be specific
"can I take you out for coffee on Friday".
- Encourage other people to visit - often people are reluctant to visit
because they do not know what to say - speak to them telling them that their
presence is precious.
There are many more things you can do - REMEMBER helping others is not about doing
"everything right" and following rules - it is about CARING and being YOURSELF.
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